Ignore

Yeah, Let's try to ignore the void of what happened in the past month and a half. I mean, what I really have to say about it is scattered across whatever the heck it is that got in my way since then. Really, all I'd normally be saying right about now is some garbage about all the interesting quotes I had heard my family say while I was in Chicago. All the phrases that somehow end up echoing through other people. I'd be telling of how I'm trying to apply most of it to my life. Then, here, I'd mention that the most important piece of advice I had heard was just the word "chew". Well, no. I really can't go into detail about that just yet because I've already had that conversation with each of my friends. One of them, at least, that I can visualize right now.

I suppose what is now "in" is just what I've been trying to workout with the people around me. Er. See, I can talk about this just because it's about what I've been talking about with friends of mine, rather than the same old stuff I've been repeating to them all week. I know it to be true, that I've said "photoshoot" almost too many times, in the past few days. I've always noted the rule of etiquette..or just social behavior.. that goes something like "if you find yourself telling the same stories, more than once..". Not sure. I guess the rule is not to become boring by only having one thing going on in your life. Ouch. Still, I realize that none of my friends are actually thoroughly talking to each other, so I feel as though I am circulating and refreshing the things they have to say about...our latest..plan. Right. That's a mystery. Yeah, we're really trying to get some type of a ball rolling on our.. you know.. ugh.. entertainment careers. Sorry. It's just the type of thing that it hurts to talk about unless it's already actually working.

Ironically enough, this all probably does lead to some of that Chicago advice. Like I am reluctantly going to repeat, I wanted to come back to Georgia and "hit the ground running". Agh. Still, I shouldn't be ashamed in the least. I did just that. Hm, I mean, I guess I did run that day. No, no. Eventually I did have somewhat of a business meeting. Two, kind of, but eh. So, what.. This business lunch kind of reminded me of what the live Cool Winners show really did. What any of our old stuff did. It just built up and, you know. The more stuff that people can simply access daily, the more they'll want to see you on rarer occasions. Er, in this case, mostly. Obviously, at this point I'm not going to give away the specifics of what the meeting was about, but trust me. No, though, it made me realize some ideas about promotion and stuff like that. I guess the other meeting I sort of had kind of helped, too.

So, that's how it slowly developed. As I looked at my phone's messages to realize that I had almost had no conversations throughout one of these weeks, I knew I had to put my foot down. I started barking out ideas, to as many folks as would listen. Became a merry-having gone-round. As I discussed with Fide, we are building a network. Ah, see. You'll see. I'm kind of done for this moment in time. Attention span. Ah well.

Swell

This is how I react to getting stung by a bee. It happened four days ago. Don't worry, I am probably a little bit allergic. This was my first ever sting, so it's pretty good. It actually came at a time that I needed it the most. My shoe was digging into the back of my heel, and the sting actually just numbed or out-did the other pain. I must be dissolving, since that "mind over matter" thing from last year isn't working.

Besides that, I'm kind of "I wish I had more time to prepare for the past." You know what happens. Stuck in some other day, and the future hits you on the back of the head. Nothing is ever the "furthest thing from my mind," and why can I not remember? Almost everything I ever knew just took a hike. No doubt I was blabbering and drooling and dispensing growls.

That's when I finally realized what people mean when they claim not to understand what I'm talking about. I never get around to it. Ok, fine. It's probably the purest from of "saying what I am thinking" because the actual main ideas and responses are in my head, but the details and "reminds me of" are already out before I even have the chance to speak. See? When I just now did that.. this situation was equal to when you see someone typing next to you, and you glance down to see that they wrote something interesting. "Heh." er "huh."

I can imagine trying to avoid situations where you'd be dumber than the folks around you. I can imagine. I can imagine trying to. I can remember examples of this situation, though. The only right move is to give up. There's no one there to have your back.

Anyway, as far I can remember... "I'm surprised there wasn't an explosion." Surprised there was no "this group doesn't make any sense." It did make sense, always. It just depends on who is holding the camera. In that case, I'd be the radical. Weeks of taking some person on a tour of your closest friends. Various people. Some don't return. Then, some don't return.

I left out a lot of days that actually happened. Those friend tours are never a full-on experience. They're all free trials, I guess. Sign up. It's already a mutually accepted embarrassment to agree to having a "group" of friends, so I'll be honest. Yeah, my friends are perfect, but shouldn't they actually be more 'friend' than 'perfect?' Not true. Imperfection is the only reason you ever find friends. Their weak spot is exactly your way in. I'm beginning to think, though, that my friends are built for me. I mean, that's why I tried to oust the whole "this is my group of friends and we rock" type of thing, but I think we have certain skull shapes and certain mixes of chemicals. If I am correct, then I can prove it.

Other than that, the test results will take a while. They will take one long day, one short day, one 24 hour-long night, one day to reassemble, and one day to prepare. Should arrive on the summit of the week's end.

That's why it's form-fitting, though. If you've stood through all life has made you do, and you find out that you've done a lousy job... then "oops." Step on your neighbor's dog's toe. It yelps. You say "oops." Your neighbor's dad reassures his family, "he said 'oops'" as if it was ok and settled. You ask for passage into the afterlife. You stepped on a lot of folks, but not on purpose. You've said "oops" a whole lot. You can't be wrong. This has happened a lot. There's no turning back to do things the right way, and every time you fill the cracks of your mistakes.. you're rewarded with something that's just "ok." Perfecting something wasn't a hassle at all, apparently. What I mean is: you can't be wrong if it is 'your way.' You know, something you've already heard. I just don't see how it didn't take the same amount of time.

I'm straying into an entirely different idea. Something I've wanted to say for a while. It only works in conversation, I suppose. One-sided ones.

Anyway, if it truly is "all of that and then just... this" then I truly have nothing to worry about. Another case of "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

I know. At this point, I'm dreaming of celebration. "Time to celebrate my career" types. I'm just flavored water, waiting to be frozen into an... "ice pop." It'd be perfect for me to ironically say "I can't wait for the summer." Oh no, I can. Elevator tryin' to crash. Waiting for the phone to destroy. You know, now there's a little green squiggle. I wonder how far it'll reach.

I wish that I can find a proper, happy ending or a conclusion to my current phase in life. If that makes sense. I only wished, for the sake of the clock. When I am given the chance to wish, then I might as well. When I am given a book, then I have to do that thing that people do when they can't believe it. Read it.

So, here I am.

Forgot

Hello. I am somewhat. That's who.

Somewhat getting full of himself, somewhat keeping self in check. Trying to combust all at once, but with no regard for trend-sets. I am allowed to be careful. Whether or not I choose to continue, after folks remember me, is all up to and away.

However, enemies and all, I must craft. I must craft without use of its nature. Embarrass all those who can't breathe, yet. Yet, again. Always watching your favorite, but choosing to scream. Scream to me, and let your scream catch up to me when I can't hear. All a set-up.

Help us all, and help us out. Our final culmination. Always a finale, but not my own. Still, knowing what I'd do.

End these sentences? Ok.