Watched

Ha ha ha
Really too much.
I woke up today. That was enough. I mean it.
I got right up and possibly ate breakfast. It must have gotten stuck in my teeth because I watched myself trying to dig it out with my tongue. Frosted flakes.
I watched my day, today. I was third-person, today. Now, I feel like I didn't even have a day.
A weird day, man. A weird day.
It was the first cold day, though. My lips are getting dry, I noticed, when I watched myself.
When it was happening, though, I did keep on seeing that my hands might have been dry, too.
So weird of a day. Really.
I started, right off the bat, my "video series". Today was devoted to starting my "video series". The first objective was, simply, to start it. I am so distressed, now. Everything went perfect.
I explained what I had in mind for the rest of it, so this counted. Then, I was invited to philosophy club, again. More excuses to film the day. I think what has me stumped, now, is that today is kind of a.. paradox? Now, I think I'm beginning to wither in some type of understanding. This is only based on the fact that I am typing this right now, but I think I watched more than just progress being made in the footage. Something is haunting me about today. It has to be the change in weather. Can I fight it, this time?

Immediately after I completed one of this year's goals, which actually paves the way to completing more goals, I feel that I need to take this time to stay inside and get cozy maybe. Instincts? I have to make things work around each other, I guess. If this 'goal' works, then maybe everything else will fall into place. That old 12th grade Frankenstein logic. Iconoclast in the class. Gah.. reminds me.

Different topic, but I was actually called a perfectionist in that class. After helping write a story about a murderous housewife.. a poem about a murderous housewife. I literally thought it was cliche. I guess that's why it was only a slight comment about my proposed perfection. Sorry, this must be an inside joke or something. A moment only I can enjoy. Kind of like how I really just can not wait to tell my story about that Muddy Waters, Jr. show.

Ok, I'll do it. Once I get this story straight, I'll keep working on it. This stupid, stupid "series". I'll call it stupid, so it'll have some resentment in the mix. It already looks exactly like me. This is my solo thing.

Wait.

Duh.

That was the whole reason I came here. To tell about my day. Er, to tell about my mood. I feel like I'm.. you know. "In, over my head." or whatever. I actually took it upon myself to start- and finish- an entirely separate project, aside from.. Cool Winners, Terror Keyboard, Brain Camp, Daytime Buddies, Let's Dants, Body Snatcher, street art, the secret music video, the promos, and.. real life. What..what am I thinking? Will something as taxing as a documentary about myself be what I need to get all of these projects rolling? To complete this year's goals? To help the people around me? To finally build relationships with people I actually want to know? How was I doing this before? Oh no, I must have been neglecting a bunch from.. posting things on the internet. Ha, not to mention I'm considered to not have anything going on, right now. Though, somehow, something going on would actually ironically make things less hectic. I don't know. I don't have a lot to work with. Material-wise. Even though that's the point I'm trying to make. Gah.

Well at the very least, no one will watch it. The best that can happen is that I actually complete my list. Yeah, see. I'm actually not doing this to impress folks with my projects, not to gain attention, and not to.. I forgot the other thing. Still, my reason is to simply.. do something. Not 'do something' out of boredom, but to do a thing that causes me to do other things. Alright. It's a responsibility. All I have to do is pick out what parts of the day I like, and compile it. That's all. Then maybe I'll get to those other things.

Agh, though, what if it actually does end up looking like some blog? Heh, well it doesn't matter. See, like I said. I'm not doing this for show. I'm not expecting anyone to watch. I'm trying to keep up with myself. All I need to know.. is that this can be considered a good thing to do. Or a right thing. I don't know. I'll give myself rest if I need it. This is stupid, though, talking about it. 2 am, somehow. Back to the other topic. Feels like I didn't even enjoy the day. Hah, I know I did, actually. Ok fine. Mood shifts, in the fall.

Let's watch.

Hunt

It's ok now. The first thing that happened this morning was a mutual stomach hurting. Dizzy, Nick answered his phone to find out that someone had found his wallet. None of us had any idea it was gone. There's the first mission of the day. Collect wallet.

We stumbled to his car, a nice day outside, and got inside. We were first welcomed by that demo disc that the man from last night had given us. We drove to the location, easy as that. Passed the house and went onto the campus of Kennesaw Mountain High School to turn around. There it was. His wallet was just on the hood of some pollen-covered truck.

On the ride back to my home, we listened to things that can only remind us of an earlier time. He dropped me off. Mission over. I finished up the video I had been working on. Still not sure of its results. Eventually time passed, and some other plot tried to thicken. 2;15 instead of 2:45 sure. Oh well.

And Tonight was the first time I had ever watched a movie two times in a row.

Three different days, practically. I hadn't even mentioned Justin's false hope and Mark's new hope. Those will unravel.

Such a long day put into those words. Amen.

Back

On this day. Of course, it's the day i wake up at 6:30 to my alarm. In my old room. I sing along with my alarm. I still don't want to wake up. At the same time, my mom is walking into the house to wake me up. I hear her walk down the steps because that's where she thinks I'm sleeping. I keep pretending to look at my phone, so that when she opens the door, she knows I'm already awake. Outside the door, she tells me there's breakfast. I try to kind of get a little stretch more of sleep, until I figure it's useless. Then, I smack my eye to wake myself up, and there we go. No time for that shower I needed. Just time to get to work with that haircut.

I honestly don't know how my hair got to this stage again. The big puffed curly thing I always end up with. There wasn't the stage in between where it starts to get curly. Just already annoying hair that I was trying to grow just so i can get a good haircut. Day went by fast again because it was grocery. Mom brought the 4 jugs to fill with water, when she came to pick me up. Went home a shower, and read some old magazines with interviews of Outkast and Goodie Mob. Wanted to dose off. Instead, Fide and Grant came over. It was planned, but almost a chance to sleep.

They kept asking about fruit to eat, and they were looking around my room trying to tease me for being serious. Turns out, I'm fine. I did great. Only problem now, is that I hadn't been able to fit in any exercise in the past month. I noticed, but no one else did. Always the problem. You can never tell. Nick, to make himself feel better sometimes, tries to tell me I'm trying to make myself feel better when I talk about how I know I'm doing better in the fitness area. Heh, not related to the situation, though. Anyway, after a while of whatever, we leave. My mom says she's going to buy me something for dinner this night, for when I come back. Yeah, we left my house and headed to Grant's.

I kind of feel 'eh' because their latest mindset has just been the Twill project. I wasn't so excited about it soon after I came up with it, but I guess the right mood makes it better. Still, when I found out that we can work on anything ad that the Twill video wasn't going to be the main focus, I became enthused. I said, "In that case, let's just do a quick talkshow video." So we did. Somewhat of a Cool Winners show, but it couldn't be any type of Cool Winners Show because it doesn't play on what it means to be a cool-winner. An average talkshow type thing, with bloopers and all. Finally got over that "love doctor" idea I'd been wanting to do. Easy. I hope I look ok when the video is done. It's kind of not my character.

Grant's parents got us some pizzas, that we were excited about using in the video. After all the mess, we did end up getting back to Twill. Of course, it ws a different song. I guess the whole Twilogy thing is ok as side-project. I mean, for me, it's strictly a side-project. Still, we worked on a pretty good new track. Hah. Then, another. I also got to finish my cosmic girl song. Not what I was expecting, but ok for now. We also very quickly made a little bit of an old-fashioned 'rap diss, aimed at Grant's brother and his friend's little rap group they started. Nice. Oh yeah Fide recorded 2 songs by accident. Hm. At a certain point, they copped out and wanted to go to bed. Eh.

Whoa, i guess that was it.

Pillow Though

Actually an hour later but malfunctions. Almost throwing in the towel until I remembered last night's technique. Restarting the computer. I had never trusted that logic before. Bare feet too, actually. This bandage won't stay on my hand. That's for me to remember. Ok, and today I've been dealing with my eyesight. There's just no way to prove how well my eyesight was until now. I really hope it's just the cold weather, like it was last year.

Ok, so work first thing. I was kind of on edge. For the first half of the day, yesterday wasn't over. Everything I heard, I expected to be trouble. It wasn't the trouble I expected, so it didn't matter. All I ended up hearing was chuffer talk, to keep me worrying. Then, I actually heard "I see you did a lot yesterday," and it actually meant that all the work I did actually showed. I didn't see it when I was done, yesterday, but at least it crept in somehow. After that, i really did not want anything else to be told to me. I actually planned on saying that, too. So, I was ready for it to be done.

Mom came to pick me up, and I was expecting the stuff she had planned to be earlier. When I saw her, she was debating whether or not to sign up for some free physical test, tomorrow. She did, and we left. Since nothing was happening until later, we deposited my check and she dropped me off at the library. Homeless man introduced himself. I got three fiction and three non-fiction. I didn't mean for that to happen, but I must've set my limit to 6 books. Just some bs.

I guess when I came back home I jsut started downloading videos. Old videos I had made, videos Nick made, one that Grant posted of mine, and various classmate videos. I did my thing, and ended up with a personal little freakout. It won't be one of the memorable ones, but it's definitely one of those to start off another one of our little renaissances. If anyone but me sees it, though,..

First thing when mom got back, was to eat at Stask and Shane. Odd, kind of. It was actually very cold. We came back home for a second, then we went bowling. Yeah, I figured I'd be tired by this time. Wasn't that bad, but we ordered quesadillas. Required fun, basically. Fide was texting and calling, thinking he was missing something but it's just a Friday for him. I have no idea when my next Friday is. For that matter, I have no idea when my next Friday is. Ok vision.

We went back to the Windy Hill house so Mom could get some sheet she forgot. Actually picked up some laundry, and I scoped for anything we may have left there. Hell if anything of mine is lying around there. I still have no idea where my box of clothes is. Probably in the worst place possible, just because it's nowhere to be found. I'm not explaining correctly. Two more 8 hour days left, that I know of. I'd better go.

end