Waiting For The Phone To Destroy.

Indention. Well, ok in a void. Last level, kind of. Actually I might have the ability to be a very brilliant writer if I wanted, somehow. Otherwise, it's all basic day to day sheds and bids.

This month, I have definitely come to a certain area of having nothing important going on. Whether it's from having a group conversation and realizing that I don't even actually have social anxiety, or if it's from literally extracting every idea I've ever had. For me- the way I can tell that I have nothing going on or nothing good to think about, is realizing that what I am thinking about is just completely ridiculous. Of course by "completely ridiculous" I mean something along the lines of "way too normal." Things like the homecoming dance, getting jobs, finding a place to live, and entertainment news. I shouldn't have to bother myself with those ideas. I call those normal because the thoughts I would.. normally.. have consist of ideas in the neighborhood of 'creative' and when anyone thinks that way, then it's probably just 'weird.'

Before I elaborate on the specificity of what I actually think about that terminology, I'd like to let out a little something about the last thing I thought about. Now, if I could just completely ignore the fact that I'm no longer in high school... then the actual thing consists of me going to the school's newly established Philosophy Club. There, everyone was given a chance to speak, and introduce who knows what. The group was willing to hear one anothers' personal philosophy on life, and what a pleasant surprise, they wanted to hear mine.

I had nothing.

Pretty difficult, but I knew I had thought this type of bull shed for years. All I do is come up with good quotes for myself to live by. I really couldn't do it this time, so I ended up copping out and trying to explain the Comedy philosophy: something I feel like I had personally used as a foundation for my latest ideas on life. I hit many dead ends explaining this because it wasn't really what I was feeling at the moment. If I were to express this idea, then I'd have to completely be frightful of the fact that I was where I actually was. Comedy is a paranoid philosophy now, and I can't do so well now that there's not so much anxiety involved. So in a last bit of effort, I called up the help of my comedy team to join me. Just set the tone for the rest of the chaos of having a decent sized group of people interested in philosophy.

There was a time, years ago where I actually thought I am really all about philosophy. Then after that, when I realized that I hated it and that it was icky- of course because of the whole desperation of Cool. It's a real stomach ache. But then it all is.

I left the meeting to talk to Alex, in the hall. It ended while I was out there, and I basically left unfulfilled. When you're given a chance to show what you're thinking to some folks who are actually interested- and you just say nothing- is really just.. hell- a tease. That's why I think from now on it's either better in writing or better when asked. Like, i think I like to be interviewed but I'd hate to be questioned. So I might just submit some old writing of mine. Or suggest some questions. Just kind of put off by the confusion. The whole day was pretty disappointing for a lot of people, I noticed.

I forgot what I was leading up to.. oh yeah I just wanted my excuse to be that I was done with making any good points, and so I couldn't speak about anything new when it was finally time to.

But there is still more chances. Those folks didn't judge so harshly. Just ruined it by calling them dumpsters. Oh, and I

Incredibly Late, but Excuses. (now even later)

And a week or so ago, I was in Chicago.

Road trip, of course. With my dad and little sister. Situations around finally being able to but still, after a while, we were able to go.

I guess our reasoning for going was to visit my Grandma..er.. Abuela because she recently had her gallbladder removed. She had been in some pain, and we just took this as an opportunity to help her out while visiting with the rest of the family.

We first got in town at around 10pm, but who knows with the whole time zone thing... we didn't even give the clock much consideration throughout the entire trip. Waiting on us, at my uncle Louis's place, was a meal from Coleman's Barbecue. Does everybody feel the same way about food from their hometown, or is it generally valid for me to actually really like this restaurant? Hah, visiting Chicago., and eating food. I mean, it really feels like there are no consequences to having eaten these things. Gained pounds during the trip eh I'm fine.

Oh and, as an aside, the first thing I remember seeing when we got into the big city was a huge iTouch or iPhone advertisement on the side of a building. On that building were some rickety stairs, like the usual cliche city fire escape ones, and in that moment I just imagine an entire sequence of someone shooting an incredibly gaudy music video on the stairs, and then being interrupted of course by the stairs crashing down. And to myself, I just started laughing in amusement at the fact that I thought of that whole visualization so swiftly. Eh impressed.

But no, we just slept that night because the trip was just tiring.

The next day, we were going to my grandmother's house for breakfast, and to see my uncle Jerry and others. During the day, my dad stayed with his mom while I rode around with uncle Jerry.

He was set on taking me to buy some clothes I suppose. Which was kind of a.. situation because I'm right in the midst of a mindset of straying away from having to buy modern fashions. So, I wasn't picking out anything, and passively picky. I mean. We were at a flea market type place, filled with vendors selling incredible amounts of bootleg Michael Jackson apparel and music. Disturbed, we left and I just had him buy me some pants at Burlington Coat Factory.

Still, with my uncle, he told me that Lollapalooza was actually in town. Now, my uncle, is somehow connected with the whole 'pimp' culture -remember culture, not lifestyle- so he was especially in the know about Snoop Dogg performing that night. Agh, in depth... he is friends with Bishop Don Juan, and he has met Snoop Dogg and Katt Williams several times- that's the type of thing I'm trying to explain here. Not great friends, but still around..I guess. I don't know. But the point is that, he was trying to get in touch with Don Juan to see if we could get in to see the show. He actually had me text him on his phone, while he drove. However, after all that, nothing happened.

One thing that did happen was meeting "Debbie the glass lady". She is the official person that makes all of the 'pimp cups' and other jeweled items that are seen in various places. He was going to visit her for something, and he had to use the bathroom when he got there so she invited me in to look at her wall of celebrities with her glasses and other accessories. "You don't get on this wall unless you have a cup." The one thing that stood out to me was the fact that she had a lot of dvd's in her entertainment center. There was loads!

[and i dont think i was finished with this though]

At Least A Little Variation

ok, not to sound like "New Fashion Line Coming out in 2 Months" but still.

Here, I guess I'm warming up. Warming up, though....something I'd rather avoid because it's hot. No it's just so hot. No it's really not fair. Ouch ridiculous.

I'm still trying to find my "backdoor" because this is not living up to my standards. No. I will not take it, I am above. For sure.

Well, I guess it's time to set up the old online bank account. And I guess I'm not getting any answers from myself, so this is headed nowhere.

Ah craig.

Whoa I'm not interested.

Kill your doctor kill your downey

Redeemed? I wish...

Hey, then.

Alright so that last major event. Ok past, but now I have become an 18. Yeah incredibly embarrassing. My birthday was June 20th, a little bit.

So. New would be...not sure. We actually would like to do another show, and I may just need to look into doing shows for a little bit of a living. Sorry. But just for the sake of doing what I want more.

Here's what I want to see more of, though: I want to actually do films. short films, music videos and all that horrifying junk that makes me wish I was original. I really have no ideas right now, and I don't even know it. And before I find out, I kind of would like to at least help other folks out who are at least a little bit interested in what I do.

It feels like I'm avoiding a couple of folks, but I'm not too sure what I have to work with. People I have in mind to work with soon... well I want to get some of those skater kids to do some acting for me. Hah. I mean, they have camera appeal and they've got open enough minds. Only problem is that I might just be making Wassup Rockers all over again.

It's fine. People have already done everything, we all know but maybe I'll make a difference !!!!!!!!!! :D

Hell.

Pretty much without a camera. Probably the biggest problem. In fact, as soon as I publish this carp, I am going to turn to my sister and ask her where that warranty for my digital camera is. Like I said earlier today, "Life is death without a camera." Obviously not really, but might as well say it if there are popular kids that go around joking about blow-brains... mercy.

Gah and I forgot something good I said lat night before I fell asleep. YES!

ok, have fun though.

Embarrassed.

-_-

Hello, men.
It's a Tuesday.. Kinda miserable so all that's left is some reflection. Rich people type.

BUT. Last Saturday: June 6th, We finally performed the Cool Winners live show.
You know, our comedy team. The whole show's up on the youth tubes, but hey it went well.

Who knows how it actually all started though.. Like, months ago.. Justin and I at Swayze's. Oh yeah it was that uncomfortable night. Whoa now that I look back at it. Incredible, haha. All the stuff that happened the night the live show was conceived...

I was just... hanging out at Nico's house or something.. Nothing was actually happening..yet, but I was there for a while and I ended up leaving because he and his friends were going to some other show in Atlanta.

As I was leaving the street he lives on, I ran into this group of people with make up. They turned out to be associated with some college improv comedy group or something. I'm sure their comedy is probably not so well but that actually kind of peaked interest i guess.

Eh going nowhere. I went home for a bit that night.. My sister was home and I told her about that and about the Ska night at Swayze's that was going on. Eh. We went by where they were doing the comedy and just picked up some info but ugh. Then we just went to the ska show, though.

Eh Ska, I know...but Justin was there for the benefit of Chase Bailey and the Disreguardables no doubt. It was pretty confusing for me in general, just there with those school folks agh. Hey but at some point, I was feeling a little bold and I just kind of thought. I saw the owner of the place kind of walking around, and I just mentioned to Justin the thought of asking if we could do a comedy show there.

Then I guess we did, and I mean. Went well in the endLook, I guess I can top this off When I feel a little bit more involved,

So, in closing: lol lol dud wtf

..Or not

Here's the idea...i'm dissolving. That's right. Unless it's not.